December 31, 2008

  • Your Basic Animals

    Dear Folks,

    Well, this is New Year's Eve.  It's now about 8:36 p.m.  

    I played My Shining Knight in a game of padook, giving him a four-stone handicap, during which I made a promise to My Flagship to read an animal book with him. I have yet to honor that promise, getting sidetracked rounding up all the children to make sure they eat before time is up. 

    My wife sets rigid limits on how late you may eat or drink.  It falls to me to make sure they eat on time because they will not on their own accord.  They get sidetracked, interested in other things and forget to eat.  If only I were so lucky with my relation to food. I could use the loss of about ten pounds. 

    I went to the Dentist's today, and got drilled without anesthesia.  I told the dentist I felt sure I would need anesthesia, and then a root canal a few days later, this coming Saturday.  He said he did not think I would need anesthesia.  He was right.  I was very surprised.  I tell my students that I am a pansy.  They find that funny.  Self-deprecation is not a strong part of South Korean humor just yet, but it seems that it will be more and more in the future, as the most advanced students are more cosmopolitan and enjoy that sort of humor better. 

    Slapstick works well here, as it did in the Charlie Chaplin era of the U.S. 

    Well, I got about 40 minutes in with My Flagship, nearly twenty reading an animal book, with loads of photos and descriptions of the special features of each strange animal.  When I was young, we just had books on basic animals.  Now, they have photos of all kinds of strange creatures. 

    And I'm not all too sure it is such a good idea for kids to be introduced to such a great variety of animals at such a tender age, especially if it gets them confused about what all shapes animals can take and the strange habits some of them have.  It might be better, or at least simpler, if we just stuck to teaching them about the basics:  lions, tigers, snails, and puppies, things of that nature.  Perhaps a good litmus test to decide what is fair game to let your kids learn about might be to ask yourself, "Did I know about this here animal when I was in the third grade?" 

    The rest of our study, exploration time my son showed me internet sites, in Korean, where they had oodles of photos of some very strange, and quite colorful praying mantii, dining on spiders, snakes, even a small bird. 

    My Shining Knight went for a bike ride in the dead of winter with his mother.  They go for about 50 minutes or an hour, and have not missed for several days running.  However, I'm not so sure it's a good idea for him to be exercising at his age.  He is a first grader right now. 

    I'd hate to get him all burnt out on the concept of exercise.  That's something you need to do all your live long days, especially when you get older.  His bones might not be set just right yet for exercise, you know.  Bones are important.  So are ligaments, tendons, and muscles.  You don't want to wear them out too early in life. 

    Another thing, we wrestled together this evening, My Shining Knight and I.  He has gotten stronger.  I don't use all my strength, but when it gets to where I cannot handle him well with, say, eighty percent of my strength, it will be time to suggest we adopt other, more appropriate, father/son activities, such as tiddly winks, jacks, or marbles, only I never did any of those. 

    I need something where I can continue to win.  And as my children get older, pickings are getting slimmer and slimmer every day.  It seems like I just turn around and bam, one of my children is behaving in a new way, a whole lot more mature, unrecognizable with his previous behavior patterns. 

    For example, My Flagship no longer likes "I Dream of Jeannie," which he used to love to watch.  His mother loved it, too.  Now, I bought him the fifth (or was it the 6th?) and final season for Christmas, and he is not that interested in it.  Things change very fast around here. 

    I am contemplating buying My Flagship another video, the complete TV series (3 seasons worth) of Kung Fu, with David Carredine, for 72 dollars, plus about 15 % for shipping here to South Korea.  It has some of that fuzzy wuzzy Buddhist stuff in it, and I enjoyed it when I was his age.  Perhaps he would like it, too.  

    Buddhists are fading fast here in South Korea.  They were 49 percent when I came here, with 20 percent Christians.  Now, Christians are at 26 percent with Buddhists down to 20.  Many Buddhists have passed away, and who knows, perhaps reincarnated as Christians, on account of how come why for we have about 70 percent budding young Christians in the elementary school classes here in this neck of the woods.

    Another thing, more and more South Koreans are beginning to believe in Santa Claus.  My students and I read the reprint from the New York Sun, about "Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus," this past week, leading up to Christmas.  Well, it seems obvious that I have very little to say.  I am only creative in the mornings, and have to strain to type in the evenings.

    My children do not always behave now.  Sometimes they argue with each other.  I have been so busy that I have not as much time as I used to to spend with each of them during each day.  I will have to remedy that, something I have already begun.  But anyway, they disobey.  Can you believe that? 

    My wife or I tell them to do something and they sit there like a knot on a log, as if they had not heard us at all.  We don't throw plates or anything, but we sometimes raise our voices a notch or two, to let them know we mean business.  Fortunately, I see this as being strictly a temporary thing.  I fully expect they will obey much better when they become teenagers. 

    Love, Padooker

    ESL Note:  Students:  We have humor in this piece.  See if you can find it.  Three or more points are pure fabrication, just to be funny.